October 19, 2006 • Print This Post
In the first couple years of my publishing career, I gave quite a few talks. It was a lot of fun as people really seem to enjoy meeting authors and they are very accepting of them being human (meaning they overlooked my faults and screw ups—like the time my blouse came unbuttoned, uh, never mind…) I have to say, romance readers tend to be the most well-read interesting people! I don’t do the talks as much anymore mostly because it cuts into my writing time.
One memory that stands out is the time I gave a talk at a very nice country club. I came in after their luncheon to see a room full of women were decked out in frilly dresses and hats. They were seated at large round tables with crisp white table cloths and being attended to by uniformed wait staff carrying silver coffee services. That’s about all I had time to observe before I had to go onstage, so I couldn’t get a good “feel” for my audience. I took a deep breath and launched into my spiel. Eventually I was able to get a feel for the room. Women are really good a giving visual cues and I was able to “connect” with them. I relaxed and enjoyed myself. They were a very gracious crowd.
But this one woman really stood out. She was dressed beautifully including lovely wide-brimmed hat. She carried herself as if were related to the Queen of England. But what really caught my attention?
She talked on her cell phone for the entire speech. Seriously. It didn’t seem like anyone at her table dared to ask her to Please Shut Up.
I certainly didn’t. After two years as co-president of a large chapter of Romance Writers of America, I am fully capable of controlling a room full of women. Let me tell you, this woman had a sense of entitlement that rivaled Scarlet O’Hara. I found myself watching her and having to remind myself that I WAS THE ONE ONSTAGE. LOL!
So how is it that this woman gets away with such blatant public rudeness? Why are we so fascinated with snobby, rich, rude people?
Just for fun—what would you all have done if you’d been in my shoes? Do you suppose she was a romance snob?
Posted by Jennifer Apodaca @ 5:00 am • Filed under: Jennifer Apodaca
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Oh, that is one of my pet peeves! I work with the public, both at my full-time job and my part-time job, and it’s aggravating to say the least when someone is on the phone, holding up other people because inevitably I end up having to ask them a question but it takes a good few minutes to catch their attention.
My first response would have been to draw attention to this woman, but it probably wouldn’t have gone over very well. I guess in the future, before you start speaking, just ask everyone politely if they could please refrain from using their cell phones. (Unless it’s an emergency). That’s not too much to ask.
I can’t figure out why people have to be glued to their phones. I hate being on the phone LOL.
Here’s one of the most astonishing things I’ve seen. A friend and I went to see COPENHAGEN on Broadway. The back of the stage had a two-tiered wall and some audience members were seated atop the wall. Curtain goes up, lady on the far right pulls out a trade paperback and starts to read. Twirling her hair, fiddling with her glasses, turning the pages. The actors must have been able to see her.
Act 2 - same thing. End of play, she puts the book in her bag, rises and leaves.
Why bother going and she must have done research to know that where she was sitting there would be enough light to read by.
Still puzzles me, Kate
In a perfect world, you could just simply stop talking. Wait for the uncomfortable silence when all you can hear is cell-phone woman carrying on her conversation, then just tell her…..I’d really hate for you to miss this. I worked really hard to make it imformative and entertaining for the whole audience. I’ll just wait until you are through with your call and we can proceed. Ok?
Of course we are all waaay too classy to put someone on the spot like that, but wouldnt it be fun to do it just once??
Angie-la is right that would be so nice to be able to do, but it would be just wonderful to be able to do it………I never understand people who do that. Then there are the ones in the clinics, that sit right across from the sign that says turn off your cellphone, and carry on a conversation……….Oh and I hate the ones who use their cellphones in the washrooms………please what is so important that you have to carry on a phone conversation there?
Well I’m a wuss. I wouldn’t have been able to say anything. But you could have gone the route that the Brooklyn born and bred Barbra Streisand went a few weeks back when she had a heckler in her audience. She told him to “shut the f*ck up”. LOL.
Stacey, I HATE being behind that person on the cell phone at the bank or store, and the clerk is trying to help him. I feel so sorry for the clerk.
Kate, that’s just strange and rude!
Angie, good suggestion!
Cryna, that always strikes me as funny to “hear” people on the cell phone in the washroom too. Please,is nothing sacred, LOL!
Jill, I’m pretty sure I would have gotten her attention if I had said that! Her expression alone would have been worth it!
I saw a hilarious commercial where a guy was in church and his cell phone started ringing. The pastor said to the guy, “That better be God calling you, if not turn off that cell phone.”
Sometimes the humorous approach works best. I remember in speech class in college this happened a couple of times. There would be a couple of students talking. The professor would stop talking and say to them, “If your conversation is so much more important than listening to what I have to say then I want you to bring it up here in front of the class and tell everyone what you were talking about!” That shut them up big time!
I know if I was in that situation, I would politely ask the person to refrain from talking so that everyone else can hear and if it is so important, to please take it outside in the hallway. Come to think of it that has happend at one of the ACF meetings my husband and I go to. That stands for the American Culinary Food association of Northwest Indiana. Two older gentleman were talking and my husband politely told them to be quiet and if it was so important to please take it out in the hallway so that we could all hear what the speaker had to say. The two guys shut up and that was the end of that!
I’ll be honest, I wouldn’t have done a thing
I’m too shy and would probably be embarassing myself instead of her.
Michele, it’s so weird when you’re a guest. I had to weigh out how my actions would come off. Everyone just ignored her, so when in Rome….
Ali, you’re much classier than that could ever be!
I’d love to say that I would stop my speech and say something, but I would probably just ignore it and go on.
A couple cell phone comments and stories for you…
The place I hate to hear people on the cell phones is the library. You know it’s a pretty quiet place… and people on their cell phones… well, their conversation carries. Argh!
I was at the symphony a few months ago. Someone’s phone went off as the director was introducing the piece of music they were going to play. A couple minutes later someone elses phone rings. Argh! So, the conductor asks everyone to check their phones. All of the sudden you hear all the phones being turned off (you know they have to make sounds at that point too).
And last, my mother is a minister. A couple years ago, she asked me to call her during her sermon on Sunday morning. She was trying to make a point (and I honestly don’t remember what it was now). But, she had her cell phone with her at the pulpit and I’m sitting in the choir loft with my phone… and I just keep calling her. You can see the congregation getting upset as she stops her sermon to answer the phone. At any rate, I think she made her point and received a lot of positive feedback.
Why was she even there if she wasn’t going to listen to you? I probably would have said something about the use of cell phones while I was onstage .
If I was on the dais giving the speech, I would have said something about cell phone use at conferences that other people paid to hear the featured speakers.